Instead of entertaining each other by holding, stroking, lying quietly together or sharing intimate thoughts and feelings one or both are immersed in a soap opera of the latest sexual exploits of the rich and famous.
Often, the bedroom or even the bed is shared by a beloved pet, either canine or feline, who may be getting most of the petting and hugging. Sex therapists sometimes discover that a pet sleeps between a couple, serving as a barrier between them as an unspoken way of avoiding each other. Small children sometimes serve the same purpose.
What about your bedroom -- does it have a computer, a TV set, a motley assortment of papers and books? Have you settled the issue of king size, queen size, double or separate bed?
Is sex another work activity that takes place in the bedroom?
Separate bedrooms are a luxury of modern life. In the 15th and 16th Century, people lived in general purpose rooms as they still do in some societies (and in studio apartment?) They ate, slept, entertained and worked in the same room. Beds were often collapsible and were set up as needed. Many centuries were required to develop the concept of the bedroom as a private sanctuary. Enjoy it as such -- don't make your bedroom the public, general purpose room of the 15th Century.
Separate bedrooms are a luxury of modern life.
1 comment:
Shirley-
You are so right that it is a real intrusion of the work and social world for the bedroom and the bed not to be a private space for self and other...rest, fantasy, and intimacy. One of the common sense pieces of advice for those with sleep problems is to keep the bed itself for sleep or fun (sex) and not for worry, planning, reading, studying, telephoning etc. Your thoughts are right on the mark. It is so much fun to "drop in" on your blog and be reassured by your lively mind. What a delight.
with affection,
Bob in San Francisco
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